BigBlog

Hi All

I've moved my blog (like a lot of bloggers from Blogland) over to LiveJournal.  If you want to come and visit, feel free to pop over and say hello.  My new blog address is:

http://brisvegaslaura.livejournal.com/

Hope to see or hear from you soon...

This is freaky - I don't think I could drive it.  Something for the computer game geeks of the world.

 Click the icon.

A couple of hoons are driving down a residential street and try to knock a little kid off his bike by slamming him with the back door as they drive past.

They thought it would be great to capture the event on film for a laugh.

Chalk the result up to Karma.

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The following are actual stories provided by travel agents (apparently):

I had someone ask for an aisle seats so that his or her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.

A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii.  After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?"

I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown.  I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts."  Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Capecod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa."  Her response ... click.

A man called, furious about a Florida package we did.  I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando.  He said he was expecting an ocean-view room.  I tried to explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.  He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state."

I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?"  I said, "No."  He said "But they look so close on the map."

Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas.  When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a 1-hour lay over in Dallas.  When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and I need a car to drive between the gates to save time."

A nice lady just called.  She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got into Chicago at 8:33am.  I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of llinois, but she could not understand the concept of time zones.  Finally I told her the plane went very fast, and she bought that!

A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know who's luggage belongs to who?"  I said, "No, why do you ask?"  She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any connection?"  After putting her on hold for a minute while I "looked into it" (I was actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code for Fresno is FAT, and that the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?"  I asked him what exactly he meant, which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them."

A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of those computer planes."  I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane.  She said, "Yeah, whatever."

A businessman called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China.  After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa.  "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those."  I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa.  When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express."

A woman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York."  The agent was at a loss for words.  Finally, the agent asked: "Are you sure that's the name of the town?"  "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the customer.  After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere."  The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly.  Everyone knows where it is.  Check your map!"  The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?"  "That's it! I knew it was a big animal!"

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Billboard reads: Hi Steven, Do I have your attention now?  I know all about her, you dirty, sneaky, immoral, unfaithful, poorly-endowed slimeball.  Everything's caught on tape.  Your (soon-to-be-ex) Wife, Emily.  p.s.  I paid ofr this billboard from OUR joint bank account.

Hee hee...Channel 10 have already axed the show "Yasmin's Getting Married" and are replacing it with episodes of Futurama...click here for the link to the story.

Update:  It seems Channel 10 have removed the website that the link above was attached to.  Basically, it said that the show was axed due to the low ratings and went on about how Ten give new, creative TV formats a go (e.g The Wedge).  It also raved about the host (can't even remember her name? Jo?) and Ryan Phelan saying how wonderful they were...can't have been good enough to hold up a crap show, obviously...

This one took me a while to get...it's not easy, but it is possible.

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1. They told me at the Blood Bank this might happen! 

2. This is the 15-minute power nap they raved about in the Time ManagementCourse you sent me on!  

3. Phew! Guess I left the top off the Whiteout. You probably got here justin time!  

4. I was just meditating on our mission statement and envisioning a newbusiness strategy.  

5. I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance.  

6. I was doing a highly specific yoga exercise to relieve work-relatedstress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice yoga?  

7. Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out how to handle that bigaccounting problem! 

8. Have you ever noticed sound coming out of your keyboard when you put your ear down real close?  

9. Who put decaf in the wrong pot?  

And the Number One best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at yourdesk: 

10. Raise your head slowly and say, "... in Jesus name, Amen." (unless you work in a Mosque.)